We’re back on February 19th with the show that bravely explores the greatest issues of our time. Like what types of horses are hottest, and why.

Connect with Last Week Tonight online... 

Subscribe to the Last Week Tonight YouTube channel for more almost news as it almost happens: www.youtube.com/lastweektonight 

Find Last Week Tonight on Facebook like your mom would: www.facebook.com/lastweektonight 

Follow us on Twitter for news about jokes and jokes about news: www.twitter.com/lastweektonight 

Visit our official site for all that other stuff at once: www.hbo.com/lastweektonight

Critics have called him brilliant, a master, and the most important comedian.

The show has been hailed as incisive, righteous, and the smartest show of them all.

He's bravely explored the greatest issues of our time.

If you are gonna fuck a horse, it should definitely be this 1.

I'm calling it right now, that woman ate her baby.

And Season 10 will be our biggest, boldest season ever.

I'm not gonna be that kind of Today Show host.

things were gonna get weird tonight, didn't I?


Speaker 0: Critics have called him brilliant, a master, and the most important comedian.

Speaker 1: You don't want to take a look at this.

Speaker 0: The show has been hailed as incisive, righteous, and the smartest show of them all. For 9 seasons.

Speaker 2: Welcome, welcome, welcome! It's the last week, it's the last week!

Speaker 1: This is weird. It's the last week tonight!

Speaker 0: He's bravely explored the greatest issues of our time.

Speaker 1: Sex, sex, I'm horny, who wants sex? If you are gonna fuck a horse, it should definitely be this 1.

Speaker 0: With actual information.

Speaker 1: I'm calling it right now, that woman ate her baby. That is a fact. That is a Disney fact.

Speaker 0: That's beautifully calibrated...

Speaker 2: Oh, God! Oh, God, you threw it too hard!

Speaker 0: With Gravitas. Oh,

Speaker 2: God! Fuck you! You sneaky penis!

Speaker 0: And Season 10 will be our biggest, boldest season ever. We think. Because we haven't made it yet. So here's more of the old stuff.

Speaker 2: Oh! Aah!

Speaker 1: It's been

Speaker 2: a busy week. Has it

Speaker 0: been a busy week, Jon?

Speaker 1: Yes, it has. Oh, no, no, no,

Speaker 2: no, no, no, no,

Speaker 1: no, no, no, no, no. I'm not gonna be that kind of Today Show host.

Speaker 2: I told you

Speaker 1: things were gonna get weird tonight, didn't I?

Speaker 2: I put something in your child. No, no, no, no, not again! Do you want me to get in a car and sing?

Speaker 1: I'm America's naughtiest bitch.

Speaker 2: Fuck! Oh, fuck! Oh, shit!

Speaker 1: Dead men tell no tales. Fuck off.

Speaker 2: I did this myself! Clap for me now! It's history!

Speaker 0: Last week tonight with John Oliver. You

See all LastWeekTonight transcripts on Youtube

Season 10 Trailer: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)