In this episode, Dr. T discusses the feeling of guilt associated with taking time off and the importance of self-care. She shares personal experiences and provides practical advice for overcoming this guilty feeling.

Overcoming Guilt with Self-Care

Dr. T talks about helping women get started in launching a business and the importance of self-care. She emphasizes the need to overcome guilt and shares insights on getting started and growing a business.

Taking Care of Yourself and Starting a Business

The discussion revolves around feeling overwhelmed, shiny object syndrome, and the challenge of focusing on multiple goals. Dr. T shares examples and encourages listeners to prioritize rest and self-care.

Dealing with Overwhelm and Shifting Focus

Dr. T delves into the unintended outcome of feeling guilty when taking time off and provides insights into the reasons behind this feeling. She encourages listeners to understand and address this guilt as part of self-care.

Understanding the Guilty Feeling of Self-Care

The episode focuses on the challenges of starting new habits and the guilt associated with change. Dr. T encourages listeners to embrace the discomfort and challenges of starting something new, emphasizing the benefits of rest and self-care.

Starting New Habits and Overcoming Guilt

Dr. T shares practical tips for creating a Sabbath for self-care and emphasizes the need to rest the mind, body, and spirit. She encourages listeners to dedicate time for relaxation and replenishing their energy.

Creating a Sabbath and Resting Your Mind

The episode concludes with a focus on preparing for God's blessings and the importance of self-care in being ready for what lies ahead. Dr. T emphasizes the journey of self-care and its role in fulfilling God's plan.

Preparing for God's Blessings and Self-Care

- The video discusses the feeling of guilt when taking time off for self-care
- Dr. T, a long-time educator and business coach, encourages women to overcome this guilt and prioritize self-care
- She emphasizes the importance of slowing down and taking time for rest and self-care
- Dr. T invites listeners to share their own self-care practices and discusses the initial feelings of guilt that may arise when prioritizing self-care

- Starting something new can bring feelings of guilt and discomfort
- It's important to set boundaries and give yourself time to wind down
- Creating a Sabbath for yourself, even if just for a few hours, can help alleviate guilt and improve productivity
- Resting your mind, body, and spirit can lead to more creativity and the ability to hear from God

- The speaker discusses the importance of self-care and setting boundaries
- They emphasize the need to prioritize taking time for oneself and recognizing the season one is in
- The speaker encourages listeners to be ready for what God has in store for them and to take care of themselves
- They end with a prayer and a request for listeners to share the podcast with others

The video discusses overcoming guilt and prioritizing self-care, emphasizing the importance of rest and setting boundaries. It encourages creating a Sabbath for oneself and recognizing the season one is in, while also reminding listeners to be ready for what God has in store and to take care of themselves. The speaker ends with a prayer and a request for listeners to share the podcast with others.

If you have been 1 of those people who have felt guilty about taking some time off or doing things for yourself or self-care Because you know you have so much to do.

I promise you this episode is for you We're gonna talk about ways that you can learn to overcome them overcome that feeling of guilt and why that's important.

So that's what we're talking about on today's episode.

If you are a Christian woman who has knowledge or expertise in an area and you feel called or led to share that information with other people.

But you feel overwhelmed with trying to figure it all out.

Which guru do you really need to listen to?

And if the tech alone might be stressing you out or you're trying to figure out where will I find the time to even try to be consistent with sharing the knowledge that you have.

But you still know you want to help others grow because you know that they can grow, overcome, and become in some area of their life with the information that you have there is absolutely a way for you to share your gift with the world without feeling stressed and overwhelmed and by doing it on your own schedule as well as still giving impact.

I'm a certified executive business coach, I'm a launch expert, I am a course building expert and I am here with She Launches podcast where we're helping thousands of women across the world get started because what I know is getting started is the most daunting part of launching a business, but it can also be the most rewarding if you have the right guidance, knowledge, and expertise.

We're also going to be talking in this podcast about how you can take care of yourself, your own mental, your own self-care because this is the most pleasing aspect that I believe God wants us to be in charge of.

It is time for you to get started and I hope to see you on the inside of the podcast.

Hey there, this is your girl, your sister and your mentor, Dr.

T coming to you with another episode of she launches on this podcast.

We are talking to women We are talking to sister friends.

We are talking to Those of you who are out there that are coaches or consultants or experts or you want to be that?

Woman of God a believer a non-believer We're talking to everybody about what you can do to grow, to start, to launch your business.

We just come from a Christian perspective because that's who I am and what it is I do.

And today we are talking about overcoming guilt with self-care.

I was on a call at the time of this recording the other day and we were, it's an accountability group and I've told you guys about that group before and we have another couple of new folks that are joining us in this group and 1 of the ladies at the end the newer lady she said something to the effect of y'all just got my whole life right she said because what I'm going to focus on she had 1 thing she was going to focus on for the 12 weeks but she decided that she said I'm going to just deal with focus.

You guys know, are you 1 that has shiny object syndrome?

You have a lot of things that you're doing and here's the thing when you have a lot of things going on, oftentimes we're not doing anything we want to do well.

My Lord and my God, I'm coming in strong already.

I'm not talking about you're already down the road.

You've done what you wanted to do for yourself or for your business, you've mastered something and now you're ready to go to something else, right?

So like I have a friend of mine that I coach, she has a great podcast, actually it's called Thriving After 50, Coach Greta, Master Coach Greta and when we're talking about anything that has to do in health and wellness She don't have to have a goal for that at all.

She's mastered it lost over a hundred pounds Without any surgery any medication anything like that At the age of 66 has had She started at I think it was 54.

She looks fantastic and that doesn't have to be her goal.

Because that's something that she's mastered.

And I'm sure that at the time that she was mastering that, because it took her a little bit over a year to get there, that she was working on other goals, but she was working on mastering something good.

And what ends up happening ladies, is that we want to master so many things.

We have so many things that we're taking care of.

And there are seasons, there are times when we have to absolutely slow down.

And what ends up happening is, and this is what 1 of the sisters on the call had said, is that she feels guilty when she's not doing.

Feeling guilty, let me bless you with this, feeling guilty when you want to take time off is an unintended outcome of always having something to do.

It is an unintended outcome of always having something to do.

You didn't know that you were building this thing, this feeling, this guilt feeling, if you decide to just stay in the bed for the day, right?

And just veg and watch TV and just eat and do whatever you felt like doing.

You didn't know that that was gonna accompany a guilty feeling because you are that person that's always busy.

And oftentimes, some of us are busy because of circumstance, right?

We have to be busy because it requires things in our life, require money, and I'm not even talking about luxury.

I'm not even talking about, you know, the things above and beyond.

I'm talking about the bare necessities, you know, food, clothing, and shelter, right?

You're doing that for the most part, and it's going to require, because of life's circumstances, you to be doing a lot of stuff.

But even in that time, there are times when we have to take some time off.

And we just don't know that if we keep going, going, going, 1 of the things, as my sister said, 1 of the things that's gonna happen is you can get set down by God And you I promise you take it from a sister who has been there done that can write a book about it You don't want God to have to set you down.

You don't want God to have to start screaming to you You don't want God to let something to allow something to happen because you have not been a good steward over your temple.

That might set somebody free right there.

The temple where the Holy Spirit is supposed to reside our body, right?

What, if we are not taking care of that, right?

You don't want to have to be sat down because you are not doing right by that.

And we have to figure out ways to get over this guilty feeling.

I remember what is about about 20 years ago when I was doing my dissertation.

And I remember finishing my dissertation and I was done, I had defended, I was successful, doctor, all this type of stuff.

And then weekends would come and I didn't have any writing to do.

I literally didn't have any writing to do.

I have to be studying and for a long time I felt guilty because I was like I should be doing something.

I remember going up and getting prayer because I felt like I wasn't focused in my life because I didn't have anything to do.

Nothing that was like hanging over my head and was feeling like the enemy was really messing with my mind about that.

Just like, and I never, I think it took me a lot longer to see that it was okay to not have anything to do.

But I thought if I didn't have nothing to do and I was feeling this guilty feeling that I wasn't focused and all that, I'm telling you the devil is a liar and the truth is not in him.

Sometimes we have to be, we have to get good and or we have to get better at knowing when we have to give our mind, our body, our emotions, our spirit, our intellect a rest, right?

And watch this, God does not, I don't believe, and y'all correct me if I'm wrong, send a sister a message, I'm willing to listen.

My Lord and my God, He doesn't speak through the noise of busy.

He's not going to, but he can when he sits us down.

God doesn't speak through busy because if God sits you down, it's because you were too busy.

So if you don't want to be 1 of those people that get set down, you don't want some health scare, you don't want...

And listen, I'm not putting no health scares on people.

I'm not saying that in any way, shape or form.

I just I just know that God has a way of Getting our attention when he wants to get our attention So what are some of the things that you guys do?

To take your time so that you aren't feeling guilty.

Now let me say this, I want you guys to go to the website, shelaunchesit.com, at the bottom of the front page you can leave me a message about this.

Tell me what are some of the things you do?

I could talk about that on another episode, right?

But there are some things that we literally have to begin doing to take our time back and watch this at the beginning, this might bless you, at the beginning of doing it, you are going to feel guilty.

So when we are starting something new, I think we try to tell ourselves, or we desire to not have any ill feelings or ill effects from that new thing we're starting.

Let's say you have not worked out in several years, or worked out hard, and you go and you start working out.

We don't want to experience the ill effects of working out.

We don't want to feel like we got shot, like we hurt so bad.

And so sometimes we will tend to not do it.

If you're trying to begin to change your diet or stop going to what I call a legalized crack house, Starbucks, I said to deal with it.

If you want to stop doing that, right, because the amount of money it's costing you because you know you're drinking things with caffeine or something maybe you know you feel like lightweight addicted to it if you're gonna stop doing that you might start having headaches because of it because there are some unintended outcomes there are some ill effects to making some of those changes if you are the start if you're starting to decide that you want to drink more water you know what you're gonna do Go to the bathroom a lot more.

If you're gonna start reading the Bible more, you're gonna fall asleep at the beginning because some of the Bible is boring.

People don't want to talk about it but it is, right?

So it doesn't matter what it is you're doing.

There are going to be ill effects or impacts at the beginning of doing it because you're trying to start something new.

We are a feel-good generation and we don't want to hurt.

We don't want something to be hard most of the time.

But and that's oftentimes why we stay in a place of comfort is because we don't want to go through the the season of heart that might set somebody free.

We stay in the place of comfort because we don't want to go through the season of heart and oftentimes the season of heart is a rite of passage to where it is you're trying to go.

So some of the things that I think that you can do to get past that is number 1 understand as I just said number 1 I don't really have these numbers but I'm gonna say this is number 1 understand that at the beginning of doing it you're going to feel guilty and that's okay it'll get better it'll get better after a while it'll get better after a while Another thing is I would encourage you that in the in the evening put a stop time On your phone everybody got a smartphone and if you have a dumb phone Which is not a smartphone then just set an alarm some other sort of way, Right?

Put an alarm to stop at the end of the night at a certain time.

Not just to go to bed, but time where you can wind down in a quiet way for yourself.

You can read if that's what you want to read.

I'm talking about something that's just mindless.

And again, I'm saying this seriously because When we when we have that when we when we do like I've done it before where I am reading like at the end of Night, I'm reading a reading the Bible or I'm reading a business book, But that stuff I should be doing anyway.

So then I try to do it during my me time when that's not, I gotta do that during the rest of the hours that I have.

Or I take, I say I'm gonna take 15, 20 minutes to do some of that, right?

I'm gonna take 30 minutes to do that, to read the Bible, to read something in business, if that's what I wanted to read something in self-help, because reading is my thing right now.

Then after that, I can decide to pleasure read, right?

Break up the time, but give yourself an alarm every day, not 5 days a week, not just on your work days, not just on the weekends, every day To tell yourself to stop and to shut everything off Don't take no phone calls and put your phone if you have a smartphone put it on do not disturb Right So that you can have some wind down time, you can have some relax time, you can begin to let your body rest, you could do whatever it is that's going to bless your spirit.

Because that's something that we need if we are going to get past, that's gonna be something that's gonna help us rather, that's gonna help us with our overcoming this guilty feeling of self care.

Don't do that to yourself I'm telling you cuz I tricked myself like this to hit the snooze button or I'm gonna stop in a minute before you know What you 30 minutes past your time, right or or you're gonna want to balk on it?

I'm not gonna do it today I got more stuff to do you you you got to stick with it.

You got to stick with it Another thing is I want you to try to create a Sabbath for yourself.

Now we know the Bible talks about having a Sabbath and we know that we all just feel like we just still have stuff to do.

And while this season for you, wherever you are in your life, may mean that you cannot take a full day, take some blocks of time.

Take as many blocks of time, many hours, many blocks, hour blocks that you can.

So maybe you could say like you take a particular day and you have 4 hours, that's all you can spare on that day and that's your Sabbath time.

Start with 4 till you can push it up to 6.

And then when you get to 6, push it up to 8, right?

Like start somewhere because you, we have to start somewhere in order to get where it is we need to go with overcoming this doggone guilty feeling because we are super women.

We taking care of our children and depending on where you are in your life, you might be parenting your parents.

I know 1 of my niece said, my niece said, it's hard to raise parents these days, right?

And so, you might be a caregiver for parents, right?

You might be at a high profile job or in a position at work where you're making a lot of money and you are the 1 that has to do a lot of the work, right?

You might be, you might have a business that you're getting off the ground.

The church don't, you know, extracurricular things, right?

You're training for some, all those things are things that are important that you have to take some time off.

So even if you can't take a full day Sabbath, take some some hour blocks, whatever you could do until you can do more and dedicate that time for you.

I remember a few years ago when my goddaughter had me doing a Sabbath day, because I work 7 days a week.

I'm not even playing because on this grind, it's like you can't take no time off.

And when I tell you I balked on it for a long time, easily 6 months, easily 6 months, and then I started looking forward to it.

I started looking forward to it because I was like, this is my time.

If I want to stay up and read all night long, 3, 04:00 in the morning, I can.

I can do whatever it is I want to do, right?

Like it started to feel good and as of late I've kind of gotten away from that full day and that's something that I absolutely have to get back to.

So I'm telling you guys this because it's something I live with.

The more that you do this, the more that you decide to take time off, you will find that you are doing more because you are resting.

It almost sounds counterintuitive, it almost sounds like backwards logic to be able to do more when you do less or do more when you're resting.

But I'm telling you that when you are able to rest your mind, your body, and your spirit, I believe that God honors it.

I believe that we get to a point where we can do more.

We get more time to be able to just be like, oh you know what, that's good.

And I believe again, I absolutely believe that God is always speaking, we're just not always listening.

You can look outside of your window and God can give you a revelation by watching the trees outside, my Lord and my God, because that's the kind of God I serve.

But we might not be in that space where we can hear what he's saying through those leads, right?

You might be able to hear God, you know, in the shower, walking down the street, driving, listening to your music, hearing someone speak, listening to a podcast, doing something on your job or your business, right?

And I remember my girl just literally told me the other day that she was in a in a play acting and God was downloading to her while she was on stage in the middle of a dialogue and I was just like you know And what he downloaded to her was absolutely nuts, right?

This idea that she's going to have coming up.

I'm actually going to have her on the podcast soon.

But if we are not in a place, If we haven't began to learn how to set that time aside to rest our temple, it's harder for God to speak.

As I'm saying this, I literally got to say this to me.

When I'm going through this season of not hearing from God, could it be because I'm too busy to hear from God?

My Lord and my God, literally just downloaded that to me.

Because I'm in this season, you might find yourself in a season where you're not hearing from God.

But is that because we are doing too much and therefore cannot hear from God?

So if I'm supposed to be cutting off myself at night at a certain time, I need to get back to doing that.

If I need to be taking my Sabbath, I need to get back to doing that.

I need to get back to making sure I'm setting time aside to do nothing so that I can replenish my thinking, so that I can replenish what it is I'm doing.

I may have to set projects down for a season to say I can't do that right now.

My accountability group is really helping me to recognize you doing too much, right?

Because 1 of the things when you get to doing things, ladies, even the gentlemen that are listening, when you start picking up more to do, you have to also understand the season you are in, meaning are you in a season where, again, you're taking care of others more than normal?

Are you in a season where your job is more demanding?

Are you in a season where you're traveling more?

Are you in a season where you feel overwhelmed?

Are you in a season where you're helping out some loved ones more, right?

Your finances might not be where they need to be.

So you not only with what it is that you want to do, Not only do you have to consider that, but you also have to consider the season you're in and what's happening around you.

And you have to make sure that you're making allowances, right, for that as well, right?

You have to make allowances for that as well.

So these are some of the things that I believe that you should do to be able to get over that guilty feeling of self care and understand, as I said, that feeling as you are doing this, it is going to still happen.

It's going to take some time, but do it anyway.

I almost want to demand that you do it anyway because it is you.

I don't want to be at the point where God is ready to call me home and I have not done the things that I want to do.

I want to do well, but I want to do that for me too.

And so now it's a time for us to begin to do what we need to do because God, when God has us, we all know, and I'm ending with this, what God has said to many of us in life.

Well, I should say many of us know because some are still searching for that and that's okay.

But for those of us who know and we believe that God has something for us, you have to make sure that you are ready for it.

Are you ready for it with how you're living your life?

If you're looking for a husband, are you ready for it?

Are you doing all the things in the work on you like are we you know I'm single too are we right so those are the things that we have to get we have to get in control of and understand that it is a journey not a destination.

I believe if we're doing what we're supposed to do, God will bless it in the end.

Father, I thank you for this word that you gave me.

I am hoping, Father, that this is something that's a blessing to my family that is listening to this podcast.

God if they have someone else that needs to hear this God I'm asking you Father to put it on their heart to send this podcast to someone else God because it's really about you Father.

It is really about you and all that we do and all that I do Father.

It's all about you and spreading the good news for you guys because I want us Father.

I'm asking for us to be able to take care of ourselves while we're on this side of heaven and while we're trying to do your will.

Hey sis, before you take off, I'd really appreciate if you took 30 seconds to head over to Apple Podcasts or Spotify to give me a rating for this episode because as you know, ratings are the most important currency here in this type of platform.

Also, if you found this episode helpful, I'd really, really appreciate if you shared it with 1 of your sister friends that might need this word of encouragement to get started themselves.

The more we can share the good news that we're getting here on She Launches podcast, I believe the more that God will be pleased and the more we can impact the world.

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E66 Guilty Self Care.mp3