The podcast host and guest discuss the discomfort around asking questions and sharing personal experiences, setting the tone for the episode.

Uncomfortable Conversations

The conversation shifts to shared experiences, discipline, and grounding in different cultural contexts, reflecting on the impact of upbringing and parenting styles.

Shared Experiences

The discussion delves into diss tracks, their significance in hip hop culture, and the roots of hip hop in black culture, highlighting the impact and evolution of diss tracks in the music industry.

Diss Tracks and Hip Hop Culture

Discussion on the significance of Kendrick's lyrics to the black community and the importance of understanding cultural context.

Interpreting Kendrick's Lyrics

Emphasizing the value of shared experiences and the need to acknowledge cultural differences in conversations.

The Importance of Shared Experiences

Exploring the intention and meaning behind hip hop lyrics and the disingenuous interpretation by some podcasters.

Intention Behind Hip Hop Lyrics

Highlighting the significance of unacknowledged feelings and shared experiences in relation to Drake and podcasters.

Unacknowledged Feelings

Discourse on the importance of respectful and informed cultural conversations and the need for understanding without intruding.

Respectful Cultural Conversations

Acknowledging the value of different perspectives and experiences, especially in the context of music and culture.

Appreciating Different Perspectives

Reflection on the importance of respecting cultural boundaries and knowing when to contribute to conversations.

Respecting Cultural Boundaries

Embracing differences and diverse perspectives for collective growth and understanding in society.

Embracing Differences for Growth

Discussion on the impact of the 'black girlfriend effect' and the significance of embracing cultural differences for positive outcomes.

The Black Girlfriend Effect

Reflection on the importance of embracing differences for collective improvement and the value of diverse perspectives.

Embracing Differences for Collective Improvement

Appreciation for the beauty of cultural exchange and the positive impact of embracing different cultures for mutual benefit.

The Beauty of Cultural Exchange

Highlighting the importance of embracing differences for collective betterment and the need to reject negative labeling of diversity and inclusion efforts.

Embracing Differences for Collective Betterment

Encouragement for audience engagement and interaction, including subscribing, commenting, and following on social media platforms.

Engagement and Interaction

- The conversation is a podcast episode called "Can I Ask You Something?"
- The hosts, Al and Justice, discuss shared experiences of different races, specifically related to parenting and discipline.
- They talk about the differences in punishment and grounding between white and black families.
- They also discuss the impact of current events on their lives and the importance of having a friend to turn to for support.

- The speaker shares personal experiences of being grounded as a child and discusses different forms of discipline
- They also discuss the importance of apologizing to their children and the challenges of parenting
- The conversation also touches on the evolution of disciplinary methods and the impact of personal experiences on parenting decisions

- The discussion is about the significance of diss tracks in Black culture and how they have evolved over time
- Diss tracks have always been highly regarded in Black culture, stemming from the tradition of "the dozens"
- The impact of diss tracks has become more venomous in the age of social media and increased access to celebrities' lives
- The conversation also touches on Eminem's role in hip hop culture and the influence of blackness in the genre
- There is a disagreement about the effectiveness of Kendrick's diss track and its impact in the culture

- The discussion is about the interpretation of Kendrick's lyrics and the impact of certain lines on black listeners
- The podcasters involved in the discussion are mostly white and may not fully understand the cultural context of the lyrics
- The conversation also touches on the idea of embracing different perspectives and the "black girl magic" phenomenon
- The importance of embracing differences and understanding diverse perspectives is emphasized

The speaker discusses the importance of empathy and understanding differences, and encourages viewers to engage with their content and follow them on social media. They also mention a transition in their social media management.

- Podcast episode "Can I Ask You Something?" hosted by Al and Justice
- Discussion on shared experiences of different races in parenting and discipline
- Differences in punishment and grounding between white and black families
- Impact of current events and the importance of support from friends
- Personal experiences of being grounded and different forms of discipline
- Evolution of disciplinary methods and the significance of diss tracks in Black culture
- Disagreement about the effectiveness of Kendrick's diss track and its impact
- Embracing different perspectives and understanding diverse perspectives emphasized
- Importance of empathy and understanding differences highlighted

I don't know about you, but I never saw our conversations as uncomfortable.

I had the understanding of, well, if he's asking, he's wanting the truth.

Whether it's uncomfortable or actually gonna hit him upside the head, it is what it is, he asked for it.

I don't know, I think the uncomfortableness comes from kind of the whole idea behind this podcast is like, I don't know if it's okay if I ask this and not as my question okay but is me asking the question going to be perceived as okay.

My name is Al, Alex, We're still trying to figure it out.

I'm here with the esteemed queen of the Say What Radio Network, Justice.

I love, yes, yes, please insert the applause and clapping.

I love that every time you introduce me it's a different 1.

It's like, how am I feeling about old Justice today?

Catch me on a bad day, I might say something mean.

I will say let me say this since we started releasing episodes and I know It's been a while.

Like I said, some of in the episodes that are releasing now that some of the stuff that we talked about in our first few episodes have been a little older or whatnot, but it still just is such a joy to be able to have these conversations, not only as 2 people who want to be in each other's lives, as well as embrace the experiences they've had, but also kind of like share that with the world.

Like with everything that's going on right now, all of the just, that's in the world.

I don't even know how to explain it, but you know, it's just like, shit just doesn't feel right.

But you have to have that hope and that those bright spots in there, that stuff can come from uncomfortable feelings and growth and getting outside of the box that you normally would probably live your life.

Cause it's, it feels secure to broaden your horizons.

yeah, let me just do this plug for the audience.

Go out and get yourself a friend like justice, where you really can just turn off the world, right?

And just be silly, have conversations, and even like serious conversations, make them silly, have fun, pick up a weird hobby.

But I mean, they always say election year it's the excuse for everything that happens all year.

We talked about that a little bit, a couple episodes ago.

Like it's, It's a weird time for sure, but buckle up, hang on, get yourself a friend, tune in, subscribe, all those things, review.

I look forward to every recording session that we have.

So Thank you for allowing me this opportunity in this crazy world we have.

So stick around for this roller coaster because it's just going to get better.

And like Al said, we just here to be silly with some information.

So we got a question tonight, or should I go in mine?

We've both got some questions, but let's start with yours, because it's funnier.

Okay, so there is, if you don't know, I am a TikTok addict.

I Go to group meetings on Tuesdays and cookies So now that is possibly being banned I've been on it a little bit more than I usually am.

And 1 of the videos that I saw was, it was a recreation of 2 guys.

1 is dressed up like a mom and the other 1 is acting like a kid.

And it's like when your mom helps you with your homework.

And right now, just saying that, I know that there's a bunch of people out there, most likely minorities, who have this image of what is probably happening in this.

Mom is being very, very strict and kind of aggressive with it and just like if 8 plus 8 is this, what is 16 minus 8 or something like that?

And because you're under pressure and because they're kind of just like on you, you have this feeling like, and you'll say the wrong thing.

And they'd be like, what in the, how do you monkey nut?

And When I saw it, like I was just cracking up.

I sent it to Alan, he's just like, oh, okay.

And I'm like, the trauma that I did this brought up, but it is hilarious.

I sent it to my friends and they were like, oh my God, that's my mom.

And in the comments, it was the exact same thing.

And I thought to myself, it is so extraordinary that although we all have our different lives and everybody is unique, we all have this shared experience.

And since I'm asking, might as well ask on the thing.

And again, it just comes from, I really have never seen where there's just like this experience and maybe it may be something like college related or football or something but I don't really see where white people like oh my god my mom did that too or we did that too that type of thing so I'm just curious do do do what are some shared white people experiences and every time I say that it sounds worse

let me do 1 of my favorite things speaking on behalf of all white people.

I saw that video and it was funny and I got it, but it was not my experience.

So I'll give this caveat too, that I actually grew up with my grandparents.

So when I was 4 years old, they adopted me.

And so if you think about it, like there's a generation gap between, you know, for what most people my age experienced and what I did.

And I joked when we were texting back and forth about this that yeah, it was really bad 1 time.

I got a C and my grandparents made me skip my yoga retreat.

But it's funny, Homework was a funny topic.

I never really had any, like I didn't go to a great school.

It wasn't, like it was just, you know, public school in a pretty small rural town.

And so I didn't have a ton of it and like really passed like third or fourth grade, like my grandparents really couldn't help me with any of it anyway.

So I was on my own and they just assumed I was going to do it.

And if I needed help, I would ask them, they'd figure it out.

But the punishment piece of it was something I wanted to go into.

Like, like I was a kid that got the belt and that was, I didn't think anything of it until I started, you know, when I became a parent, my wife and I were talking and she's like, are we spankers?

And I was like, I don't, I guess, I don't know.

And then we had that experience of like, okay, so there's 2 white people talking, right?

And let me caveat this, her dad, who took her into this private room to give her her whoopin, put a book in her pants.

So she didn't actually even get the belt.

Yeah, like I, and it didn't take very often.

Like I was a good kid, I did dig very many and I was like, okay, I get this, I get how it works.

Here's the other caveat too, I've been 6'1 since like sixth or seventh grade And so really I grew pretty fast and it didn't seem like necessary to hit me at that point.

So I didn't really get it past that much, but I did have some friends And I wanted to pull some of my audience to give you a better answer for this.

I met her in high school and I didn't really get to be friends with her until college because she was always grounded.

So it was was that a thing in the black community?

Because it was just like you did something, you got the belt or or whatever but it was just like oh you want to act the fool?

You can't do this for, you know, such and such.

It was just like, I'm taking away this stuff because of that.

It was never really just, oh, you're grounded type, type of thing.

And I remember when because I had my love of TV in pop culture and watching a lot of the shows that were on TV at the time they would say stuff like oh you're grounded and I remember saying it to my mom 1 time when my when my esteemed brother Dre had gotten in trouble and I was like is he grounded?

And she looked at me like you want to be too?

Oh okay so it wasn't really a thing then?

Okay yeah So like getting something taken away and being grounded for us was like, it was 2 different things.

And a couple of times in my life, I had been grounded for a week or whatever, and it was, you know, usually for doing something like wildly reckless.

Like I think I was 14 and I took my grandpa's truck out like for a joy ride while they were gone or something.

And I think I was grounded for the rest of the weekend or something.

Like I then I should have gotten the belt at that point, you know?

But my friend, she got grounded for everything.

And so the 1 example she told me that was like 1 of the more extreme ones is her mom, she worked at a hospital, she went to work 1 day, came back in 03:00 in the afternoon or whatever.

And the laundry had not been switched from the washer to the dryer.

And so that commanded 1 month of nothing.

They took away her instant messenger, which in that time frame, that was it.

I forget what it was, but she was dead to the world.

She got to come to school and go home, and that was it.

think it's only because the state said she had to go to school.

But then she was telling me about this other 1 when they were younger.

So they had this rule where there was no burping at the table.

Relatively common, polite, all those things, right?

But like her mom left the kitchen and then her older sister, I don't know, like 3 or 4 years older than her said, hey, do you want to have a burping contest?

And so she, you know, her older sister started burping at the table, like as loud as she could or as long or whatever.

And the mom walks in the room and she goes like very calmly, goes, I told you what the punishment is for this.

And now, So she had to eat the rest of her breakfast in the garage, which is fine, but like it was January in Illinois.

And apparently she was just wearing a turtleneck and underwear and she had to go eat out in the garage.

And what's really funny about this is like, you hear these stories about the mom and you think like, oh man, she must've been like really strict.

Let me tell you, she was 1 of the nicest friends moms I'd ever come in contact with.

And as they got older, like she would come out to us, like, you know, when we were in college, she would come visit and just hang with us and like, you know, buy meals.

And she was super generous, very lovely person.

So I think sometimes as parents get painted as like the, you know, the tough parents and it's really just tough love is, is kind of how I look at it now, you know, 25 years later.

was it, we'd be out like in college, right?

And, you know, we'd make some like lewd comments or whatever.

And then our friend would be like, Ooh, I don't know if I can go along with that.

And we all kind of laughed about it, but she was, she was concerned she would get grounded in college and I think her mom could have pulled it off.

I think discipline is always just kind of you know personal thing or whatnot.

But I remember this this lady she was a big YouTuber for a bit.

I mean she was talking about how she would discipline her kids and basically talking about the family life.

And 1 of the people were always like oh well that's child abuse and you know you shouldn't be doing this but some of the stuff that she was saying didn't really sound like that in the beginning but as you continued on you like ma'am did you just did you just say you duct tape the hands and the feet oh okay and you saying this to people out loud?

I think sometimes this stuff just doesn't, I think she needed some shared experience from somebody to be able to tell her as a friend, yo ass is crazy.

She ended up, yeah, eventually getting convicted for child abuse.

But it was just amazing to me how, again, it ended up being kind of like shared experiences, where a lot of people were calling this out, like, OK, I know where this is going.

But because I had never experienced some of this stuff, but it started off in my mind from the stuff that she was saying, like, it wasn't that bad.

But when she started adding stuff on, people were like, yeah, that's the progression.

It starts off like, oh, yeah, that's not too bad.

So I took his bed away, that type of stuff.

I think 1 of the other things she was like, oh, he couldn't, oh, 1 of her 5 year olds, they did not, she had asked them, did they have their lunch?

And when they were leaving, she's like, Yeah, I got it.

Called the school called a little bit later.

And was like, Oh, such and such doesn't have a lunch.

You got to make your stuff before you eat and don't lie.

So I was like, yeah, that's not that bad.

But it turns out she was doing other shit after that.

So but the people in the comments again, like I said, they saw the progression.

Yeah, it's funny because there's always a full story, right?

And people don't often share that full story right away.

I catch myself all the time with my kids, like I love them dearly.

Sometimes they're the most frustrating humans on the planet though, you know?

And so I'll catch myself overreacting to some things and then I gotta immediately check myself.

1 of the things that my dad told me that he always wished he had done more of when we were little is apologize to us.

And like my dad, He wasn't the disciplinarian or whatever, but there were moments where he would let his feelings show and you were scared because you didn't know how capable he was, but you didn't really want to test it.

But it's something that I've done with my kids a lot and that's the other end of it too, right?

Like people, you know, the never say no parents and stuff, but like kids need structure, they need discipline, they don't need to get beat up, right?

So yeah, I tell my kids all the time, I'm so sorry, and here's why, right?

This is why I was triggered, and this is why I got upset, and you can't be lying to me about this, but I should not have, you know, XYZ, whatever.

And then it's cool, like, it's just having conversations because they are humans, right?

It's kind of like being at work at home because you have to be different.

You can't yell at your coworker because they've eaten your lunch.

Well, Or that coworker that just leaves dirty dishes in the kitchen?

But yeah, you just have to, it's, parenting is 1 of those situations where you just will never really know what to do.

You are completely learning on the job no matter what and it's really hard for a kid to understand that or even grasp it.

I will be honest I was like maybe 28, 29 when I was just like my parents are people.

Like they're actual people with like fucking feelings and wow.

Yeah, you ever hurt your parents feelings?

Oh my god and that's that's another thing if parents feelings are hurt you really they really can't really say it you know because like what what what is the kid gonna understand they're just gonna be like well I just I really did want to hurt your feelings, but they don't necessarily know why.

I will, it was like an epiphany where I was like, damn, my parents are people.

Like really 1 of those situations like wow that's why they made that decision even though it was a crazy it was a bad decision but they made it because they're a person.

yeah it's it's funny like you always hear the expression like they don't give you a playbook and it's like the more I'm in it like the more true that is like I wish there was a playbook I would still fight against it because there'd be something, There'd be a word in there I didn't like or something and be like, they don't know what they're doing.

But it really does develop into all different facets, right?

And you had actually shared, this is going to sound like a funny segue, but I promise it makes sense.

You had shared this, it was a diss track, right?

That Kendrick Lamar did about Drake called Euphoria.

And it hit me when I was sitting here listening to it, I was like, man, things have really changed a lot.

And then they have it all at the same time, right?

There's all this, you can go back and find all the history of like the Tupac Biggie, you know, diss tracks and stuff back and forth.

But like, but you got to carry like that, the, you got to carry like, you know, the certain rules and playbooks, right?

And everything that you do, but it's also always evolving.

So I wanted to ask you about diss tracks just in general.

Like they seem more significant now, they seem more common.

And I guess like, what's kind of the hard about this?

Is this really about power and status and checking other people in your field?

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The One About Shared Experiences.mp3