- The piece discusses Alex Jones, an influential member of the media known for his outrageous statements.
- Jones has a large following, with an estimated 6 million people listening to his radio show or watching it online every week.
- He has been supported by Donald Trump, who has appeared on his show and promoted content from InfoWars, Jones' platform.
- Jones frequently promotes and sells his own products on his show, often spending a significant portion of his broadcast time on advertisements.
- The products he sells range from vitamins and nutraceuticals to survival gear and even a whistle to signal Bill Clinton.
- Two-thirds of Jones' funding reportedly comes from selling his products.
- The piece also mentions Jones' controversial claims about the Sandy Hook massacre being staged by the government, which has caused immense pain for the parents of the victims.

- The video discusses Edward Group III, who is featured in an Infowars ad promoting a product.
- Group claims that various health issues are caused by parasites and harmful organisms brought in by refugees.
- However, it is revealed that Group's credentials are not as impressive as claimed, and he does not have a degree from MIT.
- The video also criticizes the high prices of Alex Jones' products, highlighting that similar products can be found for much cheaper elsewhere.
- Jones is shown to be defensive about his products and their prices, claiming that the money made is put back into the business.
- The video questions the authenticity of Jones' claims and his motives for selling products.
- It suggests that Jones uses fear-mongering tactics to sell his products, as seen in the example of the "gay frog" clip.
- The video concludes by questioning the credibility of Jones' claims and the true purpose behind his product sales.

- Dr. Ted Luke III introduces the John Oliver Moisture Armored Tactical Assault Wipe for use exclusively on the perineum.
- The wipe is said to distract the brain and make people feel better about what they have seen.
- The wipe can be purchased for $1 million each at infowipes.com.
- Other wipes in stores are said to be dangerous and can kill you.
- The wipe is claimed to have the power to heterosexualize frogs, which is seen as a solution for refugees.
- Dr. Ted Luke III shows before and after photos of himself using the wipe, demonstrating its effectiveness.
- The speaker mentions that people have paid Alex Jones $45 for a jar of chocolate-flavored chicken juice, so anything is possible.

- The text discusses Alex Jones, a media figure known for outrageous statements.
- Jones has a large following and is supported by Donald Trump.
- He sells his own products on his show, with two-thirds of his funding coming from this.
- Jones has made controversial claims, including about the Sandy Hook massacre.
- The video criticizes the high prices of Jones' products and questions his motives.
- A fictional product called the John Oliver Moisture Armored Tactical Assault Wipe is introduced as a satirical example.
- The video concludes by questioning Jones' credibility and the purpose behind his product sales.

Alex Jones is known for pushing conspiracy theories, but he also spends a lot of time promoting his own products. John Oliver and a “doctor” “from” M.I.T. test out his marketing strategy.

Connect with Last Week Tonight online...

Subscribe to the Last Week Tonight YouTube channel for more almost news as it almost happens: www.youtube.com/user/LastWeekTonight

Find Last Week Tonight on Facebook like your mom would: http://Facebook.com/LastWeekTonight

Follow us on Twitter for news about jokes and jokes about news: http://Twitter.com/LastWeekTonight

Visit our official site for all that other stuff at once: http://www.hbo.com/lastweektonight

-♪ ♪ -♪ ♪ We're gonna talk about the media, specifically 1 increasingly influential member of it, Alex Jones, the Walter Cronkite of shrieking batshit guerrilla clowns.

And I know you may be thinking, there is nothing more I need to know about Alex Jones, because you've probably seen crazy clips like this.

And I'm not saying people didn't naturally have homosexual feelings.

You think I'm like, shocked by it, so I'm up here bashing it because I don't like gay people.

I don't like them putting chemicals in the water that turn the friggin' frogs gay!

If he is that upset about a government conspiracy that is not happening, just imagine how upset he's gonna be when he finds out about 1 that actually is.

Like the fact that the government is turning raccoons bilingual.

They're all fluent in French now, and they will be working that into conversation.

And that famous clip is by no means an outlier.

Jones is a charismatic performer who gets charged up on a regular basis.

So there are plenty of lesser-known outbursts like this.

My spirit gets close to that evil and I feel it and my whole spirit just goes, ahhhh, ahhhh, ahhhh!

That's my will, my human spirit saying, crush those that would hurt the innocent.

Go after the enemy, build a civilization, be honorable.

Well, at least now, we know what Friday night lights would have looked like if they'd given Coach Taylor a nasty PCP habit.

-♪ ♪ -♪ CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Now, look, ideally, ideally, the first thing you should know about the Alex Jones show is nothing.

But unfortunately, It is an important part of a lot of people's media diets.

An estimated 6000000 people listen to his radio show or watch it online every week.

And we know at least 1 Jones fan seems to be current Russian ambassador to the United States, Donald Trump.

He supposedly called Jones after the election, has tweeted content from InfoWars and 1 of its editors, and just a year and a half ago, even appeared on his show.

I just want to finish by saying your reputation's amazing.

You will be very, very impressed, I hope.

The only thing that could have made that moment any grosser is if Nigel Farage, Bill Cosby, and Phil Spector were all on the same call.

So, look, it is no wonder that Jones has been getting a lot of coverage recently.

We even mentioned him on our first show of the season back in February, and in his response to it, he seemed a little annoyed with me.

Your ratings are in the toilet, you're a joke.

After you lectured us that Donald Trump could never win over and over again, because, you know, you're the intellectual.

Everybody knows the British accent's intellectual, even though there's no facts behind it.

And now you make fun of me out of context, and I'll go, look at this loon.

They want to hear somebody that can speak to them and touch them inside.

And 2, My British accent does not sound intellectual.

Believe me, I sound like a chimney sweep passing through a wood chipper.

Jones is right that too often people don't present him in his full context.

And let's first set aside the key context that Alex Jones has repeatedly used his show to fuel speculation that the Sandy Hook massacre was staged by the government, which has been deeply hurtful for the parents of those children over the years.

That is disgusting, and it should be disqualifying in terms of ever taking him seriously.

Sadly, doing things that disqualify you from being taken seriously doesn't really seem to be much of a thing anymore.

But there is a piece of context you may be less aware of, and that concerns the nature of Jones' show itself.

And if you tune into the whole thing, your most shocking discovery might be how frequently and shamelessly he pitches products that he sells.

In fact, remember that clip from him earlier, yelling about snakes.

Let's just go back to that and play it out a bit.

go any further, we've got to fund this operation, we've got the very best nutraceuticals out there.

I don't know if I can run this for another week or so.

We want to run it through the end of the month, but that's like 11 days.

don't want it to sell out before more gets in.

X2, the good halogen, 20% off, Infowarslives.com.

Whoa, that is a hard turn to have to make.

The Satan-worshipping, deep-state globalists are gonna murder you and your entire family.

They are coming for you, they're coming for all of us.

In 1 week of recent broadcast on his site, we found he spent nearly a quarter of the time either talking about or playing ads for his products, or pointing you to the InfoWars store.

And if you have never gone shopping on InfoWars, you are in for whatever the exact opposite of a treat is.

Because there's the kind of survival gear that you would expect alongside more surprising items like organic shampoo, body wash, and deodorant, as well as products like Combat 1 Tactical Bath Wipes, a $10 pack of moist towelettes that can be used anywhere needed, including the perineal area.

Which, if you're wondering, is this region right here.

That's right, Alex Jones is trying to sell you sloppy wet rags for your taint.

And when you are done wiping down the area between your genitals and anus with a glorified wet nap, why not pick up a Bill Clinton rape whistle, which, according to InfoWars, should be used to let Bill know you're in the crowd and that you know the truth.

-...you just spent 6 dollars on a whistle.

And by the way, our order came with a free 9-11-was-an-inside-job bumper sticker that we most assuredly did not ask for.

And look, radio hosts doing ads is not inherently unusual, but since 2013, Jones has increasingly focused on promoting his own products, which he sells on his site under his Infowars Life brand.

Particularly, vitamins and nutraceuticals, which I believe are the result of the word nutrition fucking the word pharmaceutical from behind.

But this is a big part of Jones' business.

Two-thirds of his funding reportedly comes from selling his products, and there are a lot of them.

And the reason I know that is, we bought a whole bunch.

There is a Super Male Vitality, a Super Female Vitality, Wake Up America Patriot Blend Coffee, Lung Cleanse, Brain Force Plus, something called DNA Force that costs $120 a bottle.

And Child Ease, a herbal blend, which according to InfoWars, is designed to soothe the mind and bodies of children, which is a profoundly creepy phrase.

And then, there is Caveman True Paleo Formula with bone broth, a chocolate-flavored drink mix made from bee pollen, stevia, and the dust of chicken skeletons.

Now, according to InfoWars, it is 1 of the most popular new health trend in the world today.

And by the look on Jones' face, it tastes exactly as good as it sounds.

You pour that in on a couple of ice cubes, and folks, it tastes, when it's creamy and thick, I think better than Ovaltine.

And it has got all the bone broth, and so much more.

This is why the ancients, they believed, had such better bones and were so much healthier.

You could freeze this, and this would be better than, like, Blue Bell chocolate ice cream.

I know for a fact that Alex Jones did not enjoy drinking that glass of Caveman, because I have got a glass of Caveman right here.

And I can confirm to you that it tastes...

It tastes exactly how you imagine a drink would taste that's made from chocolate and domesticated bird corpses.

And That is not the only time that Jones has used himself as a guinea pig to sell his own products.

And a warning now to our younger viewers, the following footage of a man graphically too comfortable with his own body may be disturbing.

Just 10 minutes before we taped this, decided to do this, because I haven't done this in

We took photos a year ago, and then again about 6 months ago, and the weight loss is dramatic already from what happened before.

-♪ ♪ -♪ Okay, so you're redder, and you're wearing a belt.

The only thing I can discern happened between those 2 photos is that you walked shirtless in the sun for 2 hours to a belt store.

You could flip those 2 photos around and the effect would be exactly the same.

-...and look, to be fair to Jones, he does have a medical expert who consults on many of his supplements, Dr.

Edward Group III, who looks like the lead in a direct-to-DVD Kato Kaelin biopic, but he's actually even less impressive than that.

Here he is in an Infowars ad explaining the importance of 1 of the products.

If you're suffering from abdominal pain, allergies, even like headaches, anemia, weakened immune system, gut problems, depression, hair loss, excess gas, muscle pain, nervousness, I mean, all these things.

If you look at some of these conditions, and then us opening up our borders, and all the other countries opening up their borders, you're just dealing with a mass amount of parasites or harmful organisms.

You can type in, refugee spreading disease.

I mean, the CDC is going crazy right now.

Actually, I am pretty sure that if you type refugee spreading disease into Google and press enter, it just takes you right to the Wikipedia page for xenophobia, which, at the end of the day, is a real time-saver for you.

Group looks like what would happen if Tom Petty was machine-washed instead of dry-cleaned, Alex Jones swears by him.

In fact, he's been pretty defensive about Dr.

It doesn't matter if you've got degrees from MIT and everywhere else, and a bunch of other degrees, the media makes fun of you and says that you're an idiot.

I mean, literally, they say we cannot sell coffee.

I've been a research scientist for a long time.

I do have, I am MIT alumni, and I can tell you that I do research all the time.

Look, let's break down that bunch of degrees Jones mentioned.

Group does have a doctor of chiropractic degree from Texas Chiropractic College, but while he lists all these other schools on LinkedIn, we checked and he didn't graduate from any of them.

In fact, we asked him and he admits he does not have an undergraduate degree.

And as for whether he's an MIT alumni, he only completed a non-degree certificate program there.

In fact, just to be sure, we contacted MIT, and according to them, it is not accurate to say he has a degree from MIT, and calling him an alumni would be inaccurate and misleading.

Which does make sense when you think about it, because this man does not look like an MIT alumnus.

He looks like a fifth-year senior at the University of Falling Off a Surfboard.

So, just to clarify, Alex, That is what we are making fun of when we make fun of Dr.

Well, that and the fact that he looks like what would happen if Iggy Pop got the Rachel.

But it is noticeable that when it comes to selling his supplements, he can sometimes show a caution that is pretty out of character.

Just watch him bend over backwards to repeatedly qualify what he says seconds after he's said it.

Maybe you've had nerves that were cut off.

A lot of people have their feeling come back.

Organically-based bio PQQ, and it's not technically organic.

The other stuff's synthetic, or apparently lab-made.

This is made from organic sources, but the bacteria's GMO.

But it's not like the super high-tech stuff.

It's a bacteria that's just been bred to be able to then secrete and produce this, just like beer is bacteria.

of good bacteria, obviously, but this 1...

It contains GMOs, which is bad, except for when he's selling you something.

And you can only find its ingredients in comets.

And it's the drop-off after that last 1 that is really incredible.

You can only find this stuff in dinosaur bones.

-♪ Ritz bits ♪ -♪ Ritz bits ♪ And look, Jones' products don't come cheap.

For instance, he sells this 1 fluid ounce bottle of vitamin D3 for $29.95.

But ConsumerLab.com, a supplement watchdog, points out that you can buy the same amount of D3 from other sources for less than 4 dollars.

But Jones will often give you a hard sell.

Sometimes he'll tell you his products are different than the ones that you can find in stores, and sometimes he'll go even bigger.

It is absolutely in the crystalline form, the strongest, you absorb it.

So, folks, don't go out to the store and get iodine from, say, 1 of the big chains, it'll kill you.

I honestly did not know that you could imply your competition kills people.

4 out of 5 dentists prefer Trident gum, and the fifth dentist is dead because he put a piece of Wrigley's in his mouth, and that's basically suicide.

And to hear Jones tell it, to hear Jones tell it, his products are marked up just enough to keep his business going.

As he explained in his recent appearance on Rationalizing Low Ratings with Megyn Kelly.

I mean, it costs 45, 50 million dollars a year to run that.

Well, the money that's made is pretty much put back into things.

Okay, so that is remarkable for 2 reasons.

First, 45 to 50 million dollars is a lot of money.

And second, Jones would have you believe that every penny they earn is being plowed back into a show that looks like it was filmed on the set of a low-budget porn parody of itself.

-♪ ♪ -♪ In fact, as he frequently tells his audience, he needs them to buy more to keep his truth-telling crusade solvent and growing.

We need to fund ourselves, and we fund ourselves by you buying the products.

We're at a shortfall now because of the massive, sustained economic attacks we're under, but the listeners in just 2 weeks have almost narrowed that gap.

I could have to sell my house to keep this place running 3, 4 months.

Fund us, give me the energy, and I will attack the enemy.

It's like an NPR pledge drive for people who hate NPR.

Because to listen to Jones, InfoWars is perpetually on the edge of disaster.

He even has a link on the InfoWars store where you can just give him money to help fund the fight against tyranny.

And contributors have left comments Like, $25 may not be much, but I know every little bit helps.

But Jones seems to be doing a bit more than just keeping his head above water.

Ex-employees describe a thriving business, with 1 saying he can sell 500 supplements in an hour.

And in 1 of those clips we showed earlier, we noticed he's wearing what looks like a Rolex watch worth around $8,000, which...

And, you know, as we looked around, we noticed he also seems to have another 2 different Rolexes.

And here's the thing, that is honestly fine.

There is nothing wrong with him getting paid.

I get paid to make this show, but it does fight with his message that he needs you to buy products to help keep his show going.

And even Alex Jones seems to be a little self-conscious about that disconnect.

But don't worry, he's reconciled it in a truly amazing way.

I wear a blue sports coat and a Rolex because it's a symbol of middle class and humanity having prosperity and promoting human prosperity from the perspective of empowering humanity and stealing the image of a man in a sports jacket with a Rolex that is the satanic image.

So I dress as a Satanist so that I can enter their world and show you that none of it means anything.

How stupid do you think your audience is?

Okay, you bought a Rolex so you could dress up like a Satanist.

And, incidentally, tormenting the parents of Sandy Hook should comfortably get you into the Satanic Club.

I believe that's the easy pass to whatever hell's version of the Champagne Room is.

And look, so at the start of this piece, I promised Alex Jones that I would put his statements in context.

Because he is right that if you play small clips in isolation, he looks like a loon.

But, if you play them in context, he looks like a skilled salesman spending hours a day frightening you about problems like refugee spreading disease, and then selling you an answer.

Remember that gay frog clip at the start?

He did a follow-up show explaining how chemicals were being placed in the water to feminize society and reduce the population, and then immediately segued to this.

We sell 5 different brands of the very best water filtration systems out there.

They're amazing, they cut out 99.99% of the glyphosate, the herbicides, the pesticides, the fluoride.

I mean, to an untrained eye, it sure seems like he was using the idea of a gay frog to sell his products.

Which, incidentally, is the same mistake the WB network made.

I'm not saying, I am not saying the only reason Jones is talking about the globalists systematically feminizing us is to sell overpriced nutraceuticals so we can buy luxury watches.

But if I were saying that, it certainly wouldn't be the stupidest conspiracy theory that you've heard so far tonight.

So, if Alex Jones wants his words in context, this is it.

The fact that he happens to sell so many solutions should really recontextualize how you think about what he is claiming are problems.

How would you feel if at the end of this segment that may well have made you feeling a little dirty, I tried to sell you something to wipe that gross feeling away.

Well, I certainly hope not because that's what we are doing right now.

Come with me because I am proud to say that we've been working with a leading medical expert, and I would like you to meet him right now.

And we are here, the doctor and I, to offer you the John Oliver Moisture Armored Tactical Assault Wipe.

The first tactical wipe for use exclusively on the perineum.

For goodness' sake, don't use this anywhere else.

Now, Doctor, Doctor, how is this going to make people feel better about what they've seen tonight?

Well, my studies show that when you vigorously apply this taint wipe, it causes a sensation that distracts the brain from whatever it had previously been thinking about.

And again, you've got degrees from MIT and everywhere else and a bunch of other degrees.

The media makes fun of you and says that you're an idiot.

But just for the record, you did go to MIT, right?

Well, I've definitely physically been there.

Now, you can actually buy 1 of these wipes at infowipes.com for $1 million.

They are actually available for a million dollars apiece.

And don't even think about buying a similar wipe in a store, because those wipes will kill you.

Yeah, also, these wipes have the power to heterosexualize frogs.

So, that's very nice to have, because that's been a real problem with all the refugees.

And look, look, this tactical taint wipe has demonstrated incredible results, hasn't

And now, look at this photo of me 45 minutes later after applying the taint wipe.

So, if you want to spend a million dollars on a taint wipe, go to Infowipes.com.

And if you are thinking, well, no one's going to do that, all I will say is, people pay Alex Jones $45 for a jar of chocolate-flavored chicken juice, so anything is fucking possible.

See all LastWeekTonight transcripts on Youtube

Alex Jones: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)